Trying to smile through the struggle It helps:)
Hello bloggin sisters!
I have been ill for about 3 weeks now pregressively getting worse last week. Fearing a recurrance of cervical cancer I felt like I was tucked away in a corner shriveling away in soul and body.
I am on a cervical cancer program because I do not have insurance, and I checked out well by the gynecologist oncologist. But after this check up the symptoms got really bad.
I felt like a failure as an herb teacher as well as herb walking woman.
I realized that my poor posture in front of the computer for 10+ hours a day was not a healthy thing for me in winter...that was one thing that stood out to me as I began to be introspective on my life.
I also looked outside, I have a bounty of plants. Some of the TEH group and Tina have helped me identify. But so many more are popping up and these old herbals at our rather aged library are not much help.
But the chickweed is alive and well. Already I have gathered her for oil and have that macerating. Nettles-yay now resides on my land. Cleavers too.
I rescued a bloodwort from a local park adn brought her to my land.
The Elder is leafing. The dead nettle and henbit and wild onions we are using in soup as well as dock and dandelion.
The johnny jump ups are popping up here and there.
But my saving grace yesterday was the violet leaf. Never before did I feed so much goodness enter my body then went I went to nibble on her yesterday.
Seeing all these lovely plants, and considering my symptoms, I have been nibbling on chickweed, plantain, and johnny jump up flowers. Also digging some dandelion root although they are so small.
And best of all, the plants are healing me.
Fearing the worst, I began this nibbling hoping that any inflammation would subside.
My abdomen was swollen, I had pain, I could hardly move, and my muscles seemed to continually spasm. My lower back hurt, my middle back hurt. Pelvic pressure was strong. But these little plants are getting me through. I am not in the strong pain, my muscles are getting less spasmodic. the marshmallow root tea I have been drinking has been soothing,and if there was a cyst causing this, maybe the chickweed dissolved that. I dont know.
What I can say is that I AM SO GRATEFUL TO BE ALIVE and to have a place to even type this out...giving praises to the little plants.
My mom was dx with lung cancer and it looks like she is on her way out. She and I were never close, but she is my mom and I have been trying to help her long distance as she works through this dx. She has been a heavy smoker all her life, been on oxygen and she really feels this is it, however she wont go back to the oncologist to find out what her true state is. So it is a time of my life that I have never experienced prior and regardless of her being a crappy mom to me, it is sad losing your parent. I forgive her completely. I just want her to find out what is going on so she can have the best care possible as she exits planet earth.
Bless you all in your spring joy-I miss ya'll